Desert Warfare[[Hidenori/Open]]

[Etincelle Noel]

Him… it was because of this guy… because of this guy… all of that… It was all wasted because of him! I couldn’t forgive him. My fist shook as I stared him down. I adjusted my sunglasses with my left hand… bringing them down from my forehead to cover my eyes. Meanwhile, my right hand reached behind my right shoulder and grabbed the hilt to my great sword. I pulled it loose of the strap that held it to my back and swung it diagonally thrice in alternating directions as a challenge to my enemy, causing a small gust of wind from the force, before I pulled it into a ready stance, blade resting on the ground behind me.



“This is… THIS IS YOUR FAULT!”



I charged at my enemy as fast as I could, my feet nearly slipping because of the sand, as my massive great sword dragging behind me tearing up the ground. As I approached him, I pulled the sword up above my head before bringing it into a downward strike with everything my upper body could muster. This guy… I was going to destroy him.
It was his fault.


“You’re the reason… UESUGI SCUM! I’LL DESTROY YOU!”

[Morei Hidenori]

"H-how dare you..."

Hidenori was on his knees, grasping at the sand beneath him. It was gone, all gone! Everything that was sacred in this moment was completely gone! This fool in front of him, he completely ruined everything!

"You terrible scourge of the Date! I WILL DEFEAT YOU HERE AND NOW!"

As the Date soldier swung his sword down at me, Hidenori's hand was already waiting and ready on his own. With one quick motion, his sword would come up and meet the man's before him, blocking the blow. While down on his knees, Hidenori's other hand would come down to grab some sand, throwing it up at the man's face. If this was successful, Hidenori would follow up by jumping forward, planning on kicking the man square in the stomach.

[Etincelle Noel]

As the heavy metal clashed against each other, sparks flew off my blade. I glared down at this guy and smirked. I was about to push down a bit more and use my entire body’s weight behind my blade, but before I could do that… THAT ASSHOLE GRABBED A FIST FULL OF SAND AND THREW IT IN MY FACE. I leapt backward, letting my sword hang at my right side in hand, and lifted up my left hand trying to wipe away the sand from my eyes. Even though he had just royally screwed me… I had to admit Date Scourge. That sounded pretty good. I think I might just use that.



“SHIT! IT’S IN MY EYE- Oh wait… I’m wearing sunglasses… It’s not in my eyes…”



But it was too late. I took the full force of the kick to my stomach, which sent me sliding back threw the sand. I stabbed my sword into the ground to slow me down, spinning around once around my blade before coming to a complete stop. I pulled my blade from the sand and charged at the ass again. I dug the tip of my blade into the sand again as I charged at him… this time I swung it up well before I reached him. Since the tip was buried, the sword strike caused a wave of sand to appear in front of my enemy, hiding my attack. I figured he would think I was going to use my sword again, so I stabbed it into the ground and charged at him free of the sword. As I burst through the veil of sand, I threw my right fist at his stomach full force.

[Morei Hidenori]

"Booyah!"

Hidenori shouted in triumph as his attack actually connected. As the Date man recovered, swinging around in the sand, Hidenori would hold his zanbato up high and at the ready. The Date soldier's sand attack coming from below would catch Hidenori off guard, and one of his hands would come in front of his face in order to stop the sand from getting in his eyes.

"Wha? HEY! THAT'S DIRTY!" He shouted, soon receiving a fist to his stomach. The attack would send the tall man flying backwards, dropping his sword onto the sand. Hidenori would attempt to quickly grab the man's arm before he flew completely back, dragging him with him. Once Hidenori hit the ground, he would quickly spin until his back was facing the man and pull the soldier over him to throw him on the ground in front of him.

[Etincelle Noel]

“You just did the same thing two seconds ago idiot!”



I was feeling pretty smug that my attack worked, but before I could celebrate the jackass grabbed my arm. I knew I should have pulled my arm back instead of keeping it held out to look badass. Before I knew it, me and that dick were flying through the sand; I tried digging my feet into the ground to slow us down but to no avail. He pulled me over his shoulder and threw me. As my back hit the ground, I rolled backwards to put some distance between us. I patted my chest as I tried to catch my breath.



“We going swordless now huh? Fine by me, jackass. Back home, I was known as the strongest street brawler.”



I dashed up at the man, but as I grew closer I went towards his right instead and ran straight past him. Instead, I ran back towards where we left the swords. I went for the closest one first, which was his blade. I grabbed it and almost turned around to fight him… but if I got both of the swords I would have the advantage wouldn’t I? I smirked and decided to continue running, dragging that idiots sword in my left hand against the ground and also picked up my sword. The ends of both swords hit the ground and most of their weight was resting on that.



“Your move asshole. I might be the strongest street brawler, but it doesn’t hurt having my enemies weapon as well as mine.”

[Morei Hidenori]

As the Date fellow would catch his breath and give his little speech, Hidenori would already be on the move. "SUCKER!" He'd shout as he ran for his own sword, lifting it in one swift motion before running to the other man's blade.

"What the hell kind of sword is this anyway?!" He'd shout back at the man as he would reach down for his weapon. Hidenori wouldn't take much time to examine it though if he was already on the move. Instead, he ould arch my arm back. With a single throw forward, the man's own great sword would be flying at him, spinning in the air in one huge flying chunk of metallic death.

"JUST THOUGHT I'D GIVE YOU A HAND! IT ISN'T HONORABLE TO FIGHT AN UNARMED MAN!"

[Etincelle Noel]

Shit… that asshole got to my sword and his sword before I did. Made sense… he had a head start. I gotta stop giving my badass monologues. Before I knew it, my own sword was thrown at me, spinning through the air. Shit I had to think of something quickly or else I was going to get beheaded by my own sword. Quickly, I bent backwards dodging the blade. I would have only one shot at this… so I had to make it count. I threw my right hand up at the spinning blade, catching it by the hilt. The force of the spin made me follow however, and I pivoted on my right foot slamming the end of my sword into the ground, causing sand to shoot up at my side.



“Not a bad throw. A little low though I’d say. THIS IS HOW IT’S DONE!”



I ran forward and threw my blade at chest level at the jerkwad. I ran behind it and jumped on top of my blade, forcing it down to the ground. The original force of the throw was still enough to carry me on top of my sword. So I surfed across the sand at that jackass, pulling my right fist back ready to punch him if my blade didn’t run into his legs.



“YOU’RE A BOLD MAN. BUT I THINK YOU’LL FIND THAT SO AM I!”

[Morei Hidenori]

Hidenori couldn't help but whistle in awe as the man before him caught the blade. He definitely had style, something that every warrior should have! Hidenori lifted his sword, ready to do the same thing as the man, but as he took a step back to prepare, he soon found himself tumbling down a ridiculously steep hill of sand that he had no idea was there before.

"OH SHIIIII--" He would scream as he rolled down. Eventually, he managed to roll onto the side of his sword, crouching down on it and regaining his balance. From here, he would stand up and look at the man, half-expecting him to have no idea about the hill either.

[Etincelle Noel]

“YOU THINK YOU CAN GET AWAY FROM ME?!”







Crouching down, I stomped one foot down and kicked the sand to increase my speed and followed the man down the desert hill, sand shooting upward to either side of me. I tilted to the left to pull in closer to that jackass as we both slid down that sandy hill. I shot my right fist out at the cocky son of a bitch, aiming to land it on his smug face, preferably right in his mouth. Kinda hoping I knocked a teeth or ten loose with that punch.

[Morei Hidenori]

"Wow, he sure is persistent."

Hidenori would watch as the Date man followed him right down the hill in an epic blaze of sand and fury. The man soon moved at Hidenori with much more speed than the tall man anticipated, and soon he could only watch as he was punched square in the face. Hidenori barely managed to keep his balance on his sword, rubbing his face as he looked back at the Date man in anger.

"YOU JERK! FIRST YOU DESTROY MY PRIDE, AND NOW YOU WANT TO RUIN MY FACE?!"

Hidenori shouted, delivering a haymaker of epic proportions towards the Date dude's right cheek. They would settle this like men. With their fists while sword sledding down a giant desert hill.

[Etincelle Noel]

“YOUR PRIDE WAS UNWARRENTED IN THE FIRST PLACE!”

His first flew towards my face, fast… very fast. But, I could see it. I bent my knees, ducking the punch going down low. On my way down, I could feel the punch whirl threw my hair. I made it, but just barely. I looked up and smirked at the idiot. BECAUSE NOW I WOULD STRIKE! Immediately, I sprung my knees up and launched my right fist up aiming to hit the jackass in the chin.

“AND ANYTHING I DO TO YOUR FACE COULD ONLY BE AN IMPROVEMENT!”

Hopefully my attack launched him into the air, if it did I would jump up after him. While we were both in mid air, I would pull my right fist back and throw it at his stomach once I approached him. With any luck, I’d be able to knock the air out of him.

[Morei Hidenori]

"WHAT THE HELL, BRO? I'M HANDSOME AND YOU KNOW IT!"

As the Date dude's attack collided with Hidenori's chin, it sent him into the air. It was a bit humorous considering how much taller Hidenori was, but he wasn't smart enough to get it.

As DAAAAATAY SOULJA aimed his fist at Hidenori's stomach, the tall man reacted by being equally as dude and sending his fist right back at his enemy's in mid-air!

[Etincelle Noel]

"NOT UNLESS HANDSOME MEANS UGLY IN YOUR LANGUAGE!"

Our fists collided in mid-air. I gotta say it was pretty badass.... BUT IT HURT LIKE A MOTHER FUCKER! LIKE SERIOUSLY! IMAGINE PUNCHING A WALL. NOW IMAGINE PUNCHING A WALL THAT'S PUNCHING YOU. IT FUCKING HURTS! After a few moments, I retracted my hand and swung my left leg at the asshole, turning my entire body along with it. I aimed to kick the jerk in the kidney with my left foot.

[Morei Hidenori]

The pain was felt by Hidenori too as their fists collided, but damn was it cool! The gringo's leg would come out to slam into Hidenori's side, and Hidenori allowed him to do so (mostly because he couldn't stop it much anyway). Pain shot through his body, but his arms would wrap around white boy's leg as he shifted their bodies in mid-air. He would maneuver them so that the Date soldier's body was on the body as they fell through the air, hoping to slam him right onto the flat of Hidenori's sword as they hit the ground.

"I AM NOT UGRYYYY!!!"

[Etincelle Noel]

"Your Engrish needs work!"

I pronounced English incorrectly to mock the bastard. I looked down after he positioned our bodies so that I would slam into my sword. That would be painful. So instead I tried rotating our bodies so that this bastard would get slammed instead. I did this by bucking my shoulders and my hips towards the right to shift our bodies. To be honest... It was not a particularly comfortable feeling doing this. Our bodies were pretty close to each other's after all...

"Having trouble with your L's wide-screen?!"

[Morei Hidenori]

"Get off me, you-... ARE YOU HUMPING ME?!"

Hidenori would shout at the westerner after his strange attempt to re-maneuver them in mid-air. He was... doing things! Terrible things! His no-no place was touching him in places he didn't need to be touched! It had to stop!

Hidenori would try to push the other man off of him, moving his body in an attempt to get him off. He ended up just wrapping his arms and legs around the guy, and it looked like they were humping each other now...

[Amakusa Takehiro]

The heat of Gassantoda was, to the mercenary, welcomed, at this time. He'd had a lot of time to reflect on his life, and it was time he'd certainly needed, considering everything that was going on, lately. Perhaps this would mean the more appropriate phrase would be that the heat did not affect him, then? Yes, we will go with that.

In the heat that he welcomed yet cared almost nothing for, Takehiro would find himself wandering. His great glaive atop his shoulder, resting, its flames seemed to do little to help the temperature. But, his thoughts were elsewhere, currently. He had thought of the pale woman, the one who decided to help him for no reason; he thought of his allies, Yukimura and Hiroshi; he thought of his friends, Haji and Shou, and most of all; Takehiro thought of the lives he took, the lives of the Yoritomo clan, the lives of the villagers who could not defend themselves against the bandits he assisted. What did his life really mean? What was it he was fighting for?

Seeking an answer to his questions, Takehiro would find none, though this would cause him to get lost in the desert. Amidst his travels, he would hear the sounds of warriors fighting, and naturally his attention was drawn. Looking up, he would see two men... humping each other. That was enough adventure for one day. Our hero decided he would head home, quickly turning on his heel and taking his leave.

[Etincelle Noel]

"What?! No you're humping me! You're the one that's latched onto me!"

As I continued to maneuver and shift myself into a better position. The two of us would slowly turn more side to side. At the rate we were going we'd both smash into the sand, not that I knew it at the time. I just kept on trying to get the upper hand. I just happened to look down when I noticed we were getting pretty close to the ground.

"SHIT SHIT SHIT! WE NEED TO STOP! IF WE DON'T! WE'LL BOTH-!"

[Morei Hidenori]

"STOP! STOP! YOU'RE MOVING AROUND TOO MUCH AND IT FEELS WEIRD!"

The guy's weird maneuvering was just making it worse! What was he trying to do, 69 hump each other?! Hidenori DID NOT WANT! DID NOT WANT!

"What do you mean we need to sto-.."

Hidenori stopped talking as they slammed down onto the ground, completely missing their swords. The swords continued to slide down the hill, while Hidenori slammed into the ground with Noel on top of him.

".... Aaaahh... I think you bruised my zanbato..."

[Etincelle Noel]

"/OW! Shit! Fuck!/ God dammit that hurt. What do you mean I bruised your zanbato... your sword's all the way over-"

I sat up a bit not really realizing I was on top of him. I looked at him and squinted... he didn't mean his weapon did he... WAS I SITTING ON SOMETHING HARD?! WAS THIS GUY ACTUALLY HUMPING ME THE ENTIRE TIME?! I stood up... my blonde hair covering my eyes and slowly walked back over to my sword. I slung it into the holster on my back and started walking away... and to think all of this happened because of a glass of water. I was going to need so much counseling to get over this.

[Ichimura Ryunosuke]

On the sweltering heat of day in the deserts of Gassantoda, Ryunosuke struggled to pull his cart across the dunes. This place was where his interest in gunnery started. A minor clan in this area had defeated a major clan using their tactics in using the rifle, and had killed a lot of their enemies. Ryunosuke had witnessed the war while also pulling a cart of minerals along the way, and had also accidentally participated in the war. By that time, he was convinced of the power of guns to speed up the pace of war.

Now he passed through this desert to acquire the minerals he needed for the next orders to come. But on this day, he had another material to search for: something to alloy the metal he used for his shots so that it would not fragment when fired. It was said that that material occurred in large quantities in an oasis within the desert, and so he would take a look there.

While he was pulling his cart towards that oasis, he heard the noise of fighting and insulting nearby. Interested on seeing hot two people fight on the heat of the desert, he moved towards the source of the noise, and he saw two people... humping each other. Ryunosuke widened his eyes on such a sight, and when the foreigner tries to shift himself into a much better position, the sight becomes more awkward, and Ryunosuke can't control his laughter. He even shouted, "More, more!" as he laughed at that sight. He collapsed into a laughing fit when the two collapsed, still in an awkward position. That really made his day, and Ryunosuke struggled to leave the two, dragging his cart along, laughing so hard. He can't continue any longer, he might die of laughter.

[Morei Hidenori]

"Ugh... you jerk... you landed on it so hard I could swear I'm hearing someone laughing..."

Hidenori pulled himself up to his feet, struggling to go after the Date soldier. The only thing hard here was this guy's head, and Hidenori planned to fix that. He would grab his zanbato, sheathing it on his back.

"YOU BETTER RUN! YOU COWARD! I WILL CHASE YOU DOWN TO THE END OF THE EARTH IF I MUST!"

This man spilled Hidenori's drink... and he would pay... he still heard laughter.

[Oda Nobunaga]

Forgot to grade this earlier, so I'll do it now.

Noel and Hidenori are some of the most interesting characters to actually read here, considering they don't seem to have a limit to how retarded they can get. I enjoyed the awkward homoments, for sure. This was definitely an interesting read.

... I'm not doing individual grading. >_>

Hidenori and Noel receive +1 Exp.